[dropcap type=”1″]H[/dropcap]ow easy is it to complain? Well, for us, women, that is the most natural thing to do; complain about everything and anything. Especially when we are in foul mood, we tend to get angry at most people around us and lash out at friends and family for even the simplest of reasons. Criticizing and feeling miserable are some of the easiest things people usually do whereas thinking and speaking in a positive way, even through our  misfortunes, is one of the hardest things!

When we are in foul moods, we tend to get angry at most people around us

We can notice that in our daily lives; when we ask our friends about their day the most common reply we get is a negative one, a complain about the bad weather, disappointment about someone who eventually did not show up, criticism over the expensive restaurant bill. They selectively forget the fact that they had a good time, they socialized with friends, they tried some new Chinese dish and they enjoyed a night out taking a break from work and daily routine. When someone asks you how you are getting along with your boss, you immediately reply negatively,  possibly forgetting the positive times you experienced at work with him or because of him.

[pull_quote_center]We can complain because rose bushes  have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses [/pull_quote_center]        Abraham Lincoln

No-one is absolutely only bad. Every single person in this world has positive traits and when dealing with people is our job to find these traits and emphasize them. Otherwise, we’ ll be for ever falling in the same trap of always complaining and pointing out the negatives in people, this way making our own life pessimistic and ourselves gloomy and miserable. When your opinion is needed on someone or on a situation, choose to find their good points and something affirmative and positive  that could come out of it. When you think positively, although positive things might not always happen, nevertheless, you will feel good, your soul will be at peace and people will be drawn towards you for inspiration and comfort.

I had read an article once, a mother had written about her experience of raising a child with down syndrome. I couldn’t quite believe that someone, like all mothers who long for their ‘perfect’ child to come, could find so much strength and courage to think in such a heartening way  and come up with so many positives out of such a sad situation.  Her piece inspired me and gave me hope!

All situations might not be idealistic  and sometimes the pain is so immense that overcomes any positive thoughts or emotions you might try so hard to save from the pit of misery you are in. However, no one ever gained much from being and feeling negative and although sometimes it seems the only way out, after you allow yourself to ‘grieve’ over any kind of loss you have to deal with, you should try, hard as that is, to gain back some of your positive perceptions of life and of people.

[quote_box_center]Let’s not also forget that by saying good things about people, we will never find ourselves in a hostile territory of gossip, criticism, and lies. For a whole week try to only think and say positive things to and about people. You will feel much different by the end of that week. If, despite your efforts, you can’t find something nice to say to someone, then say nothing at all. Absolutely nothing.[/quote_box_center]

Psychologist, world citizen, mother - Effie is one half of the alwaysladies.com founding pair. She can bring to life any party with either a smile, or a strong opinion. If like us you can't get enough of Effie, visit her blog at www.thethinkingmomblog.com

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