As part of the monthly life tips for a better way of living and psychological well being, I will be sharing with you advice which is easy to follow and general strategies on sorting out those dark areas in your life  that are bothering you.

Last month, I asked you all to try and create your life story; a detailed narrative of your past memories and experiences and of all those feelings associated with them. By trying to bring back childhood memories and events, we slowly unfold important dates of our lives as well as dark areas that we choose to forget.

Re-living these uncomfortable and sad, at times, memories, will help you realize the direction your life has taken so far and how much of your input has influenced that direction. You will get to know yourself better and you will evaluate your past behavior, this way altering some of its aspects in the future. Knowing ourselves is an illuminating process that leads to self-reflection and realization. Through our relationships, we inevitably gain a deeper understanding of ourselves, revealing surprising truths about our assets and insecurities, strengths and weaknesses

[quote_box_right]Parenting,for one, acts as a catalyst for behavioral evaluation and sheds a new light to our personal vulnerability and fragility. But we will get to properly investigate that much later. Today, we focus on changing ourselves from victims to winners![/quote_box_right]

Why do I feel this way?

Why do I feel like I am the ‘victim’ ? Most of the times you have been abused in many different ways or even in just one. Emotional neglect, physical, mental and sexual abuse, are all forms of maltreatment , insult and inexcusably detrimental  behavior resulting in you experiencing a mixture of undesirable and destructive emotions and feelings. You will need a lot of time in order to be able to process these difficult experiences and disengage yourself from the painful memories that the past scarred you with.

You will need a lot of time in order to be able to process these difficult experiences

The emotions and thoughts that stem from feeling like a victim can be disastrous and counterproductive. They can have a detrimental effect on the quality of your life and relationships with others, behavior and decision making.  On the other hand, feeling like a winner, is connected with mostly positive, hopeful, optimistic and reassuring thoughts and attitudes.

Although it is only logical and actually expected,  to feel desperate and depressed when you have been left feeling victimized, at the same time it is also reasonable to not be able to distinguish between feeling like a victim or a winner and to fail realizing your full potential. You will, however, allow yourself to reach your true capabilities when you jump from being a victim to being a winner.

Psychologist, world citizen, mother - Effie is one half of the founding pair. She can bring to life any party with either a smile, or a strong opinion. If like us you can't get enough of Effie, visit her blog at

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